Oakland University students share feelings about their privacy and social identities

By: Makaila Gaston

When it comes to human interaction, it’s difficult to always know the best approach to take, especially when it comes to matters of intruding in others’ personal lives. Curiosity is generally seen as pure innocence but, is this always the case? Even as society moves to a space of increased liberation and tolerance, personal feelings of privacy when it comes to inquisition should continue to be considered.

Nine students, who wish to remain anonymous, on Oakland University’s campus were asked a series of questions surrounding their feelings about privacy when it comes to their social identities.

These students were initially asked if they were comfortable sharing what identities they self-identify as. The students willingness to speak shows that they have a level of comfort with the topic and is important to note in the results.

After listing the identities they fall in, they were then asked the question, “when asked about your identities by people who don’t self-identify with that identity, how does it make you feel? Are you offended or do you believe it is mere curiosity?”

There were three positions on the issue gathered from students’ individual responses.

Most expressed that they take questions regarding their identities innocently. One participant stated that they weren’t offended. “As long as there is mutual respect, I take it as an educational opportunity.” The participants who shared this view generally wanted to see the best in people and had a hard time believing that someone would have malicious intent. 

“I am open to answering questions because some people genuinely don’t know what it is like to live this life,” said one student. 

Others expressed that it simply depended on the tone and the visible intent behind the questions. One respondent stated that it is easy to know if someone is being “ignorant” or “innocent” by their tone or the circumstances of the questions. 

However, some are uncomfortable depending on which identity of theirs the questions are being geared toward. Some identities feel more private than others and some questions feel more intrusive than others. For example, one respondent stated, “discussions about me being African American usually offend me because from experience, nothing good comes from those types of conversations.” The way people interact with each other typically has to do with past experience as well as trial and error. 

A lot of individuals in marginalized communities have not had the best experiences when it comes to their personal identities and others’ inquisitions. As a result, it would make sense that those same people may not be as comfortable sharing information about these identities because of the possibility of being oppressed further and/or confronting the possibility that the questions asked are coming from a place of malicious intent.

If the garnered information has proved anything, it should be that everyone has a unique set of boundaries and comfort zones. This is why it is important to always continue to respect those boundaries and be an ally when possible.